(no subject)

[pleaseloveme]

pearl and i are going to start a club where you have to pay us to date you (cheek kisses only)

we need a few more charming members, applications are open

name: write your name
charming qualities: what makes you charming
references: who can we contact to confirm your charm

[Adam]

so

things didn't work out with me and noah

don't do anything about it i'm totally fine

Comments

[opalescents]

Mmmmm this is more a resume builder.

[harmreduction]

Oh, I think Kodi is looking for extracirriculars.

[upperhandsen]

This isn't really the part-time gig I had in mind.

[harmreduction]

You'd definitely stand out.

[upperhandsen]

How so?

[harmreduction]

Maybe they'd let you be president.

[upperhandsen]

[...] As much as I enjoy power trips...

[pleaseloveme]

we'll brainstorm how to make it not sound like you were a brothel madam

[opalescents]

She’d be PERFECT??!!

[upperhandsen]

Do I get any say in it? Maybe I don't want to [...] date anyone.

[opalescents]

Oh you get all the say duh there has to be full consent for every tea party. But if you’re INTERESTED in a BUSINESS MANAGER capacity we’ll consider you.

[upperhandsen]

I do have a 4.0 in math.

[opalescents]

So does Eli but he’s also gonna have the longest booking list so we might need back up.

[upperhandsen]

I have plenty of backup experience.

[harmreduction]

I'm not going to comment on how dateable any of you are or aren't.

[opalescents]

Would you like in on this.

[pleaseloveme]

sign him up for him

[opalescents]

Pleaaase I’d never do that


*LOOK AT THE LIST

[harmreduction]

I don't have any references.

[adamho]

Scout and I can be your references.

[upperhandsen]

I can refer to you, as I often do, as someone very cute.

[opalescents]

Sure you do.

[youredoinggreatsweetie]

Tbh the baseline is like 85% dateable anyway so like everybody's starting out pretty good

[harmreduction]

Or the market's flooded.

[youredoinggreatsweetie]

HMMMMM you're right we should have dating hunger games time to lock down or perish